That “feeling small” feeling. I’ve never been able to articulate it, but I thought I might as well try because somehow you guys still read my posts even when they’re bad… J Have I mentioned y’all are awesome?
Before you point out the obvious that I am already small (I’m 5’2, and what’s even more pathetic is that I got the height in my family…), let me try to explain.
It’s a feeling of beautiful insignificance, realizing I am a small piece of a puzzle with infinite pieces. It’s a feeling of gazing in wonder at the grandeur of our world. It’s a feeling of accepting your situation and understanding that your problems are small setbacks to the greater plan. It’s a feeling of calm, of contentment, of awe.
I live for this feeling.
I often feel it when I stargaze. Or when I look out from high places. When that blog post a few months ago hit 1,000 views I felt it then, too. Luke says he feels it when he thinks of the world from the perspective of an ant. I’ve heard people feel it when they skydive, though I’d rather do something a bit less risky;)
But do you know what I’m talking about????? If you don’t, you haven’t experienced it. And you need to.
Finding something that makes you feel that feeling is soooooooo important.
The feeling humbles you while also empowering you. It relaxes you, but also challenges you. It makes you feel like, for a few minutes, that your problems aren’t really problems, and who wouldn’t want to feel like that?
Every time I start to get a big head, about something I never deserved to have a big head about it in the first place, I go stargaze. I lie there and look at the thousands of stars and I think about how I am one small person, of 7 billion, of one planet, in an entire galaxy… And it helps me get a reality check.
Every time I start to feel overwhelmed by the future, I go stargaze. I lie there and look at the thousands of stars and think about all the time. Time to change, time to grow, time to be better, time to make mistakes, time to love, time to move on…
Every time I start to feel powerful, I go stargaze. I lie there and look at the thousands of stars and think about all that I don’t know. I think about all that I will never know. I think about the whole universe and how we know only small, small pieces of it.
Every time I start to feel in control, I lie there and look at the thousands of stars and wait for a shooting star. One never comes. And I laugh, remembering that I am not in control. And to this day I’ve never seen one. Because I’m too controling.
Every time I feel absolutely exhausted, I lie there and look at the thousands of stars and think about how I’m alive and these stars are not and what a life I have to live.
Where and how do you feel that feeling? And how do you articulate it?
Live for that feeling. We are small, my friends, so very small.